Sunday, 24 April 2011

Fuck Easter!

Well it had to happen eventually didn't it?

To save me the trouble of too much writing and you the trouble of too much reading, Here's the bullet point outline of the post I'd write if I could be arsed.

  • Easter is bullshit.
  • Chocolate eggs are:
    1. nice
    2. fuck all to do with Jesus
  • Cute chicks, both kinds, are:
    1. nice
    2. fuck all to do with Jesus
  • Cute bunnies, both kinds (!?) are:
    1. nice
    2. Fuck all to do with Jesus
  • Easter is an appropriation of a pagan fertility celebration that has, wait for it, fuck all to do with Jesus.
  • It might be named after a Germanic fertility goddess Oestre, but the only reference for that is the writings of the "venerable" Bede, but we take his word on a lot of other shit, so why shouldn't he be right about this too?
  • Jesus knew he was coming back, little bit of torture, three days dead, live in paradise for all eternity, some fucking sacrifice.
  • Not even dead three whole days.
  • One man cannot absolve another's sins/crimes, especially one they never committed (original sin pffft)
  • Probably never happened anyway.
  • What kind of stupid god makes all this shit up?
    • Turn self into man who is own son.
    • Put son in obscure place to gather small following
    • Have son tortured killed to absolve all mankind's sins including, and perhaps most importantly,  an allegorical one that happened in a garden that never existed.
  • I would say you couldn't make this shit up, except of course that someone did.
  • Yes, we all like chocolate and hot cross buns (Pagan sun-wheels? Really? Anyone got any evidence for this claim apart from some drivel trotted out by someone called "dreaming sparrow-fart" who heard it during a "pathworking" AKA "Day-dreaming" AKA "making shit up")*
  • Enjoy the holiday.
  • mmm nice eggs.

*MOALP is as equal opportunities offending organisation.


PAPPA said...

The Deers continue to get digested! Having known the truths about Thanksgiving and Christmas, I am not shocked to know that Easter is also pagan holiday! Easter is an appropriation of a pagan fertility celebration and has nothing to do with it what's being told, another "stolen" festival.

Julian said...

Tim, I googled 'Atheists in Brighton' and landed on your blog. Then I saw your post and had to comment.

First, half of what you say is about right - but it's the half that's trash anyway. Like "Easter is an appropriation of a pagan fertility celebration" - that's just a throw-away comment.

The fact is, (as I imagine you know) the timing of Jesus life, death and resurrection is founded entirely on the Jewish calendar - Passover and nothing else - It certainly does coincide with pagan fertility celebrations which I know you are well aware of - but so what? Just because it coincides with and people later appropriated - has zero bearing on what matters. What matters is, is the Jesus of the Bible authentic?

F*** Easter? Well, yeah, the commercial and traditional crap - fair enough, i agree, but what about Jesus' resurrection? When you clear away all the obvious rubbish - you're still left with the question of the resurrected Jesus.

The empty tomb, the eye-witnesses accounts, the subsequent spread of the gospel, the persecution and murder of all the apostles (except John who was exiled), the initial spread of the church and the current testimony of lives radically changed by him - the globalisation of the christian faith - these are cumulative evidences that hang together - none of which have anything to do with pagan fertility etc.

I don't really understand why you bother commenting on what you and I both think of as total trash, but fail completely to mention anything at all about the bits that - even if in the final analsys prove to be fabrications - are the things that form authentic Christianity.

I also love science - but science has limitations, I know the likes of Peter Atkins won't admit that - which just proves that - not only is science entirely blind to certain realities but so are some scientists. there are valid ways of perceiving reality other than science - and failure to see that is quite simply irrational.

The last thing I want to say is, there is plenty of good reason to conclude that God and Jesus and His resurrection are realities - but there is also plenty of good reason to come to the opposite conclusion. But the staggeringly momentous failure of the over confident skeptic or practical Atheist is the total and utter failure to realise the Christian faith is not about convincing evidences (though there are obviously and undeniably plenty for planty of people) but about comeing to know the person Jesus for oneself.

Jesus Himself is the one who settles every argument. Have you ever genuinely considered Him, openly and with humility? Or have you always been entrenched against Him. He is Lord - you can come to Him and know Him on His terms.

It's not that He is not humble, but He won't deny who He is - Lord of all. His terms are, come to him in humility - because you (like me) are a mere and finite man who in fact only has a fragment of knowledge to go by - and He is God.

I'm not wanting to pick a fight, I'm sure you could win a good argument against me, but I respectfully request a rational and less emotional approach.


lordhelpme said...

Then where is he